Ever wonder why….

 

Some really silly questions to bring a smile to your face and possibly make you wonder about some really absurd things :)

• What is the speed of dark?
• When you're sending someone Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
• Why are there Braille signs on drive-up ATM's?
• If women wear a pair of pants, a pair of glasses, and a pair of earrings, why don't they wear a pair of bras?
• How come you never hear about gruntled employees?
• What is a "free" gift? Aren't all gifts free?
• After eating, do amphibians have to wait one hour before getting out of the water?
• If white wine goes with fish, do white grapes go with sushi?
• What's another word for synonym?
• If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
• When sign makers go on strike, what is written on their picket signs?
• Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all"?
• Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
• Why are builders afraid to have a 13th floor and planes
  don't have a row 13, but book publishers aren't afraid to have a Chapter 11?
• How can there be self-help groups?
• Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?
• Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
• If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
• Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
• Why is it that when you transport something by car, its called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, its called cargo?
• Why do we play in recitals and recite in plays?
• Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
• Where are Preparations A through G?
• Are there seeing eye humans for blind dogs?
• If knees were backwards, what would chairs look like?
• When you open a new bag of cotton balls, are you supposed to throw the top one away?
• When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?
• What happened to the first 6 "ups"?
• If an orange is orange, why isn't a lime called a green or a lemon called a yellow?
• Why does your nose run, and your feet smell?
•   If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot..

• How much deeper would the ocean be if sponges didn't live there?
• Did Washington just flash a quarter for his ID?
• It doesn't matter what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.
• Why is it when a man talks dirty to a woman, it's sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it's $3.95 per minute.
• Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?
• Why are they called apartments, when they're all stuck together?
• Why does sour cream have an expiration date?
• Why do banks charge you a "in-sufficient funds fee" on money they already know you don't have?
• Why is the alphabet in that order?
• If the universe is everything, and scientists say that the universe is expanding, what is it expanding into?
• If you got into a taxi and he started driving backwards, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?
• Why is a carrot more orange than an orange?
• When two airplanes almost collide why do they call it a near miss?? It sounds like a near hit to me!!
• Do fish get cramps after eating?
• How come abbreviated is such a long word?
• Why are there 5 syllables in the word "monosyllabic"?
• If it's zero degrees outside today and it's supposed to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?
• Why do scientists call it re-search when looking for something new?
• If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
• Why is it, when a door is open it's ajar, but when a jar is open, it's not adoor?
• How come Superman could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
• Do infants have as much fun in their infancy as adults do in adultery?
• If "con" is the opposite of "pro," then what is the opposite of progress?
• Why is lemon juice mostly artificial ingredients but dishwashing liquid contains real lemons?
• Why buy a product that it takes 2000 flushes to get rid of?
• Why do we wait until a pig is dead to "cure" it?
• Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them?
• Why do we put suits in a garment bag and put garments in a suitcase?
• Do Roman paramedics refer to IV's as "4's"?
• Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
• What do little birdies see when they get knocked unconscious?
• Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
• If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes?
• Do married people live longer than single people or does it just SEEM longer?
• If all those psychics know the winning lottery numbers, why are they all still working?
• Isn't Disneyland a people trap operated by a mouse?
• Sooner or later, doesn't EVERYONE stop smoking?
• Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
• Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
• Is boneless chicken considered to be an invertebrate?
• 
• Isn't the best way to save face to keep the lower part shut?
•  
• A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk I have a work station...
• Can atheists get insurance for acts of God?
• If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
• Does fuzzy logic tickle?
• If they arrested the Energizer Bunny, would they charge it with battery?
• How much faith does it take to be an atheist?
• If a tin whistle is made out of tin (and it is), then what, exactly, is fog horn made out of?
• If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
• What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
• What WAS the best thing before sliced bread?
• Ever wonder why they sterilize the needles for lethal injections?
• How do you KNOW it's new and improved dog food?
• Why do they put locks on the doors of 24 hour stores?
• Why is it called rush hour when everything moves so slow?
• If sour milk is used to make you gurt, how do you know when yogurt has gone bad?
• Why is there an expiration date on my sour cream container?
• Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
• Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
• How do you know when it's time to tune your bagpipes?
• Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
• Does "virgin wool" come from sheep the shepherd hasn't caught yet?
• If the front of your car says "Dodge", do you really NEED a horn?
• What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?
• When you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
• Do they have reserved parking for non handicap people at the Special Olympics?
• Why do they call it a TV set when you only get 1?
• How come wrong numbers are never busy?
• Do radioactive cats have 18 half lives?
• If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer?
• Why call them hot water heaters if the water is already hot?
• If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty litter?
• If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
• If nothing sticks to Teflon, how do they stick Teflon on the pan?
• How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
• If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?
• What's another word for Thesaurus?
• What would we have called the color orange if it wasn't a fruit?
• Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?
• If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
• If people from Poland are called "Poles", why aren't people from Holland called "Holes"?
• Why do we say something 'is out of whack'? What's a whack?
• If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
• Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns?
• When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
• Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
• Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
• When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say?
• Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person drives a race car not called a racist?
• Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
• Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
• If horrific means to make horrible, does terrific mean to make terrible?
• Why isn't 11 pronounced onety one?
• I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
• If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed,  tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
• Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion stars in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a wall has wet paint you will have to touch it to be sure?
• I thought about how mothers feed their babies with tiny little spoons and forks so I wondered, what do Chinese mothers use? Toothpicks?
• If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
• You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
• No one ever says "It's only a game," when their team is winning.
• Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?